Sitting in restaurants

Thought we were so grown up

But I know now that we were not the people

That we turned out to be

Chatting on the phone

Can’t take back those hours

But I won’t regret

‘Cause you can grow flowers

From where dirt used to be

I can be alone, yeah

I can watch a sunset on my own

I can be alone, yeah

The Alchemist

There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.

It’s the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting.

When you are loved, you can do anything in creation. When you are loved, there’s no need at all to understand what’s happening, because everything happens within you.

Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself.

Remember that wherever your heart is, there you will find your treasure. You’ve got to find the treasure, so that everything you have learned along the way can make sense.

The boy reached through to the Soul of the World, and saw that it was part of the Soul of God. And he saw that the Soul of God was his own soul. And that he, a boy, could perform miracles.

It required no explanation, just as the universe need none as it travels through endless time. What the boy felt at that moment was that he was in the presence of the only women in his life, and that, with no need for words, she recognized the same thing. He was more certain of it than anything in the world.

And when two such people encounter each other, and their eyes meet, the past and the future become unimportant. There is only that moment, and the incredible certainty that everything under the sun has been written by one hand only. It is the hand that evokes love, and creates a twin soul for every person in the world. Without such love, one’s dreams would have no meaning.

Don’t think about what you’ve left behind.

People are afraid to pursue their most important dreams, because they feel that they don’t deserve them, or that they’ll be unable to achieve them.

Paulo Coelho. Gotta love him.

I was trying to come up with something good to put in my bio box on Facebook

and now I’ve thought too much.

I’ve been watching the first season of Glee and it’s been making me so jealous of the cast. I was really involved in plays, musicals, chorus, and outside singing activities in the past. Now I’m in college and am having to face the realities of life. The one dream I’ve had since I can remember is to become a singer. Over time, it’s transformed into wanting to be an actress. I can’t give up that dream up so easily. I love the show Glee, but it frustrates me knowing that the cast gets to live out their dream while I’m stuck facing the realities of life.

I often get strong urges to drop my nursing major and go head-on with a musical theatre major and a vocal music minor. But I can’t do that. I have to think about things like job security, salary, flexibility, and the list goes on. I’m just tired of sitting back and pretending like I’m okay with letting this dream I’ve had fade away. I’m tired of acting like nursing is what I want to do for the rest of my life. It’s not and I know it. I’m scared to admit that to myself.

Now that I have, what can I do? Double major? Minor in musical theatre? But you see, nursing and musical theatre are jealous majors. They either singularly have your life or none of you at all. Singing and acting are things that I could do for the rest of my life. In fact, I’ve practically done those things all my life until this point.

I can’t stand reality anymore. Let me pretend.

This is how I feel.

Four Hours

Yesterday I shadowed a Psychiatric Nurse and really enjoyed it. I never thought I’d want to work with people in that condition, but from what I experienced over four hours last night, I do.

When I first walked in, I was a little nervous and uptight. For the first hour or so I was behind the thick glass and padlocked door. I kept repeating to myself a quote by Marie Curie that I thought really pinpointed my thought process:

“Nothing is to be feared, but understood.”

As time passed, I relaxed and became comfortable. When I finally got the courage to walk around and mingle with the patients, I knew I wanted to be a Psychiatric Nurse. Most of the patients were fairly lucid, functional, and could hold enjoyable conversations. I laughed with them and talked with them a little about their conditions when they volunteered the information.

Most of the patients are voluntary and realize they need to change. Most of them just want someone to listen to the strife that’s going on in their bodies and minds. They want to be seen as real people, not just a bunch of lunatics. They need to know that someone cares about them and wants them to succeed in the program. I don’t know what their religious backgrounds are, but I want them to know that a hope and trust in God can carry them.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Matthew 11:28-30.

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”

1 Peter 5:7

I cannot tell you how many of them need to hear those words.

I have this weird feeling that about everything I’ve experienced in my life has prepared me to be a Psychiatric Nurse. Or any kind of nurse. I’ve fought being a nurse and even going to Harding until just a few months ago.

Now I’ll focus on becoming what people like them need me to be and what I want to be.

My roommate's blog :)

http://fixmysituation.blogspot.com